When my husband and I decided to uproot our family from Edinburgh and relocate to southern Italy, I must admit, I was terrified. Not about the move itself, but about whether we were making the right choice for our children. Would they adapt? Would they thrive? Would we regret taking them away from everything familiar?

Three years later, as I watch my kids chatting with neighbors in fluent Italian and racing through the olive groves behind our home, I can tell you this: moving to Italy with children is one of the best decisions we've ever made. But it's not without its challenges, and there are things I wish I'd known before we arrived.

If you're considering making this leap with your family, I'd like to share the honest and practical insights I've learned along the way.

The Italian education system was probably my biggest concern before moving. It's structured quite differently from what we were used to in Scotland, and navigating it felt overwhelming at first.

Public vs Private vs International Schools

Here in Lecce, we chose the local public school system, and it's been wonderful for our family. The quality of public education in Italy is generally high; it's free, and it provides immediate immersion into the Italian language and culture. My children were initially the only non-Italian students in their classes, which was daunting but ultimately accelerated their integration.

However, international schools are also found in larger cities such as Rome, Milan, and Florence. These follow curricula like the International Baccalaureate or British system, which can ease the transition and maintain continuity if you plan to eventually move to another country or return to your home country. The trade-off? They're expensive. Often ranging from €8,000 to €20,000 annually, and your children won't gain the same cultural immersion.

Private Italian schools offer another middle ground: an Italian curriculum with potentially smaller class sizes and additional support, typically costing between €3,000 and €10,000 per year, depending on the location.

The Structure: What to Expect

Italian schools are divided into several stages:

•        Scuola dell'infanzia (ages 3-6): Preschool, not mandatory but widely attended

•        Scuola primaria (ages 6-11): Elementary school, five years

•        Scuola secondaria di primo grado (ages 11-14): Middle school, three years

•        Scuola secondaria di secondo grado (ages 14-19): High school, five years with various tracks

One aspect that surprised me is that Italian schools typically run from Monday through Saturday with shorter days, although some schools are transitioning to a five-day week. School hours are generally 8:30 am to 1:30 pm, with longer days becoming more common in newer schools. There's minimal provision for after-school care, which means you'll need to arrange childcare or adjust your work schedule accordingly.

This is the question I'm asked most often: What if my child doesn't speak Italian?

Children are remarkably resilient language learners. My seven-year-old was conversational within four months and fluent within a year. My nine-year-old took slightly longer, but both now speak Italian as naturally as English.

That said, the transition period requires support. Many schools in larger cities offer Italian language courses for international students, but in smaller towns like Lecce, formal support was limited. We hired a private tutor for the first six months, around €20-25 per hour, which made an enormous difference. We also used language learning apps as a family and made a point of practicing together each evening.

Be prepared for some difficult months. There were tears, frustration, and moments when my children felt isolated. Having a supportive teacher who understands the challenge is crucial; don't hesitate to communicate regularly with the school about your child's progress and emotional well-being.

Italy's healthcare system, the Servizio Sanitario Nazionale (SSN), is one of the best in the world, and children receive excellent care. Once you're registered as a resident, your children are automatically covered.

Registering with a Pediatrician

Every child under 14 must be registered with a pediatrician (pediatra). You'll register at your local ASL (Azienda Sanitaria Locale) office after obtaining residency. The pediatrician provides routine check-ups, vaccinations, and treatment for illnesses, all of which are covered by the national health system.

Our pediatrician in Lecce has been outstanding; accessible, thorough, and happy to communicate via WhatsApp for minor concerns. However, availability can be an issue in some areas, particularly in smaller towns where there may only be one or two pediatricians serving a large population.

Vaccinations and Health Records

Italy has mandatory vaccination requirements for school enrollment, covering diseases like measles, mumps, rubella, and chickenpox. Bring your children's complete vaccination records from your home country, translated into Italian if possible. Any missing vaccinations will need to be completed, which is handled through the ASL.

The vaccination schedule may differ from what you're accustomed to, but Italian healthcare providers are experienced in working with international families and will ensure your children receive proper protection.

Emergency Care and Specialist Access

Emergency care is accessed through the Pronto Soccorso (emergency room) at hospitals, and it's free for children under the public system. We've only needed it once, for a suspected broken wrist during football, and the care was prompt and professional.

Accessing specialists can take longer, though. Non-urgent specialist appointments through the public system might have waiting times of several weeks or months. Many families, including ours, maintain private health insurance for quicker access to specialists when needed. We pay approximately 1,200 euros annually for family coverage with a private insurance company.

Housing in Italy varies dramatically by region, and finding family-friendly accommodation requires different considerations than if you were moving alone.

Location Considerations

Think carefully about proximity to schools, healthcare, and amenities. In smaller towns and rural areas like where we live, having a car is essential; there's no way around it with children. Public transportation exists, but it is often infrequent and doesn't align with school schedules.

We chose a house on the outskirts of Lecce with a garden, which has been invaluable. Italian children spend a lot of time outdoors, and having space for them to play has helped with the transition. However, homes outside city centers often lack central heating, relying instead on individual room heaters. This was an adjustment for our Scottish sensibilities, especially during the brief but chilly winter months.

Renting vs Buying

Most families start by renting, which is sensible when you're still determining if Italy is your long-term home. Rental costs vary widely; expect to pay between €600 and €1,000 monthly for a three-bedroom apartment in southern cities like Lecce, or between €1,500 and €3,000 in northern cities like Milan or Bologna.

The rental process requires several documents, including proof of income, tax identification number (codice fiscale), passport copies, and a significant deposit, typically three months' rent. Having an Italian-speaking friend or agent to help navigate the paperwork is incredibly helpful.

If you're considering buying a property, prices are generally lower than in the UK or the US, particularly in southern Italy. We purchased our home after two years of renting, paying around €150,000 for a renovated three-bedroom house with land, something that would have been unattainable in Edinburgh.

Schools and Neighborhoods

Research the quality and availability of schools before committing to a location. Italian school districts are less rigid than in some countries, but proximity matters, especially for younger children. Visit the neighborhood at different times of day; is it family-friendly? Are there parks? Other children playing outside?

Italian neighborhoods tend to be very community-oriented, which is terrific for children. Our neighbors have embraced our family, regularly including our kids in local activities and celebrations. This social integration has been one of the unexpected joys of our move.

Moving to a new country with children isn't just about logistics; it's about emotional adjustment, and that takes time.

The First Few Months

Expect a honeymoon period followed by a challenging transition phase. For the first month, everything was exciting and new. By month two, reality hit: language barriers, feeling left out, missing friends and family, struggling with different foods and routines.

My youngest cried herself to sleep several nights, missing her best friend from Edinburgh. My eldest became withdrawn at school, overwhelmed by not understanding what was happening around him. These moments were heartbreaking, and I constantly questioned our decision.

What helped: maintaining regular video calls with family back home, finding one or two English-speaking families in the area for occasional playdates, and being patient with ourselves. We gave ourselves permission to have bad days, to speak English at home when we needed comfort, to eat familiar foods when everything else felt foreign.

Building a Support Network

Creating connections is crucial for both you and your children. Join local parent groups; many Italian towns have Facebook groups for families or expat communities. Enroll your children in activities outside of school, such as sports clubs, music lessons, or art classes. These provided structured environments where language barriers mattered less and friendships formed naturally.

Don't be afraid to reach out to other parents at school. Italians are generally warm and welcoming, although they may be reserved initially. A simple coffee invitation can open doors to lasting friendships.

Maintaining Your Home Culture

While integration is essential, so is preserving your children's connection to their heritage. We celebrate British holidays, cook traditional Scottish meals regularly, and ensure our kids stay connected to family through technology. They're growing up bilingual and bicultural, which is a gift, but it requires conscious effort to maintain both sides of their identity.

We also found it helpful to occasionally connect with other British families. It provides our children with peers who understand their unique experience of straddling two cultures.

Timing Your Move

If possible, time your move to coincide with the Italian school calendar. The academic year runs from mid-September to mid-June, with breaks in December and around Easter. Moving during the summer allows children to settle in before the start of school, reducing stress.

However, we moved in March—midway through the academic year—and while it was challenging, it was manageable. The spring weather made outdoor exploration enjoyable, which helped with the adjustment. Teachers and students were welcoming, and joining mid-year meant my children received extra attention as the novelty wore off.

Required Documentation

Prepare these documents in advance:

•        Birth certificates for all children (with apostille and Italian translation)

•        School records and transcripts

•        Complete vaccination records

•        Health insurance documentation (until you're registered with SSN)

•        Passports with appropriate visas

•        Proof of accommodation in Italy

The bureaucracy can be overwhelming; expect multiple trips to various offices. Things move slowly in Italy, so patience is essential. We waited six weeks to receive our children's health cards, three months for full residency documentation.

Financial Planning

Budget carefully for the first year. Beyond rent and general living costs, factor in:

•        Language tutoring: 80-100 euros monthly per child

•        School supplies and books: 200-400 euros annually

•        Extracurricular activities: 40-100 euros monthly per child

•        Transportation (if needed): car ownership or public transport passes

•        Trips home to visit family: budget for at least one or two annually

•        Emergency fund: unexpected medical expenses, urgent trips home, etc.

Overall, our cost of living in southern Italy is significantly lower than it was in Edinburgh—roughly 40% less for a comparable lifestyle—but the first year included numerous one-time setup costs that caught us off guard.

Working While Parenting in Italy

As an online educator, I can work from anywhere, which made our move possible. However, balancing remote work with parenting in a new country presented unexpected challenges.

The Childcare Challenge

Italian schools' shorter hours mean less work time than in many other countries. With school ending at 1:30 pm and limited after-school programs, I've had to structure my work differently. I work early mornings before school and evenings after dinner, with my most intensive projects scheduled during school holidays when grandparents visit to help.

Some families hire after-school caregivers (babysitters), typically costing 8-12 euros per hour. Others form cooperative arrangements with other families, alternating childcare duties. In our neighborhood, several families take turns hosting children after school, which has worked wonderfully and helped our kids build friendships.

Finding Your Rhythm

The Italian approach to work-life balance differs from what I was familiar with in the UK. Everything closes for several hours in the afternoon, shops have limited hours on weekends, and there's a real emphasis on family time. Initially, this felt restrictive; how was I supposed to accomplish anything? But I've come to appreciate it.

My children now come home for lunch most days, and we eat together as a family. Yes, this means adjusting my work schedule, but these daily connections have strengthened our family bonds during a time of significant change. My work still gets done; just differently.

After three years, here are the insights I wish someone had shared with me:

It Takes Longer Than You Think

People talk about settling in within six months. For us, it took a full year before Italy truly felt like home, and eighteen months before the children stopped regularly asking when we were moving back to Scotland. Be patient with the process and with yourself.

Children Adapt at Different Rates

My younger child adapted much faster than my older one. Age, personality, and individual circumstances all play a role. Don't compare your children to each other or to the experiences of other families. Support each child according to their needs.

Bureaucracy Is an Endurance Sport

Italian bureaucracy is legendary for a reason. Things that should take one visit require three. Documents you submitted get lost. Offices have inexplicable hours and close for weeks in August. Accept this reality, maintain your sense of humor, and avoid scheduling tight deadlines for tasks that require official documentation.

Community Makes All the Difference

The single most important factor in our successful transition was finding community. Other expat families provided understanding and practical advice. Local Italian families welcomed us and helped with language and cultural integration. Without these connections, I don't think we would have made it through the difficult early months.

It's Okay to Have Doubts

There were many moments when I questioned whether we'd made a terrible mistake. Days when I desperately missed the familiarity of home. Times when I felt guilty for uprooting my children. These feelings are normal. They don't mean you've made the wrong decision; they mean you're human and you're going through a significant life transition.

Despite the challenges, moving to Italy with our children has enriched our lives in ways I never imagined.

My children are growing up bilingual, comfortable navigating between cultures, with a broader worldview than they would have developed had they stayed in Edinburgh. They've learned resilience, adaptability, and empathy through experiencing life as outsiders and then finding their place in a new community.

Our family relationships have deepened. The intensity of the early months forced us to rely on each other in new ways. We've created traditions that blend British and Italian customs. We've made memories exploring ancient towns, swimming in the Mediterranean, picking olives from our trees, and sharing meals with neighbors who've become like family.

The quality of life here, with its slower pace, emphasis on family and community, connection to the land and seasons, fresh food, and outdoor lifestyle, has been transformative for all of us. My children are healthier, happier, and more confident than they were before we moved.

Would I do it again? Absolutely. Would I do anything differently? Probably not, because the challenges were part of what made us stronger and more capable.

If you're considering moving to Italy with children, my advice is this: do your research, prepare as well as you can, but then accept that some things can only be learned through experience. The reality will be both harder and better than you imagine.

Trust your children's resilience. Support them through the difficult moments, but also give them space to figure things out on their own. They're more capable than you think.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Moving to a new country with children is one of the most challenging things you can do as a family.

There will be tough days. There will be moments of doubt. But there will also be moments of pure joy—watching your child successfully order gelato in Italian, seeing them racing through piazzas with new friends, observing them become confident global citizens.

Those moments make everything worthwhile.

Written by Rachel McIntyre

From Edinburgh to Lecce, Rachel and her husband are raising two children under the Italian sun. Her articles blend practical guidance with personal stories—covering schooling, housing, and building a family life abroad that feels deeply connected.

📍 From Edinburgh, now in Lecce
Rachel writes for families navigating life abroad—schooling, culture, and finding connection in Italy’s warm southern communities.
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